What do Moses, Bill Walton, Herschel Walker, James Earl Jones, Bruce Willis, Mike Rowe, Adrian Peterson, Andrew Lloyd Webber, Winston Churchill, Jack Welch, Tiger Woods and I have in common?
We all stutter.
Stuttering is a speech disorder in which the flow of speech is disrupted by involuntary repetitions and prolongations of sounds, syllables, words or phrases, and involuntary silent pauses or blocks in which the stutterer is unable to produce sounds. Stuttering, in my case, is an involuntary repetition and prolongation of sounds or syllables, or block in which I cannot produce sounds. I have had this condition as long as I can remember. I went through speech therapy with a speech pathologist since before kindergarten and into high school. It has gotten better throughout the years but has never completely gone away. I'm told that people don't notice, but I don't believe these people. I know I stutter and I know that others know I stutter. I'm on the path of learning to accept it and living with it. I'm not at that destination yet.
Most people wouldn't make fun of a quadriplegic, a deaf or blind person, or a mentally handicapped individual; but for some reason people don't seem to have an issue with pointing out or making jokes at someone that stutters. Honestly, I believe its more out of ignorance than shallow character. I don't think people are intentionally attempting to make fun of my speech disorder, although I could be wrong. Usually people will repeat my stutter, as if I was unaware. Believe me, I'm more than aware. More often than not, the first time I meet someone they will point out my stutter. Several of my closest friends have made fun of my stutter as well as countless strangers. I don't bring this up because I'm bitter or spiteful. I've learned to be able to laugh off these situations, at least publicly. I try not to bother me, but it is frustrating and thinking about it only makes it worse. It makes job interviews or phone calls difficult, but I've learned to keep it at a minimum. A funny "stuttering" story happened a few years ago when I went to a missionary farewell of a friend of a friend. We were all in the kitchen telling stories and making jokes. I don't remember what story I was telling, but I stuttered badly on the word "commitment." A woman I'd never met jumped in and began to psychoanalyze me based on my stuttering on "commitment." She claimed I was afraid of commitment and a long-term relationship. I listened to her theory for a few minutes and then said, "Actually, I just have a speech impediment." In her defense, the woman apologized profusely and my friends and I still joke around at the story.
I stutter but so do a lot of famous and successful people. Because of my stuttering, I've had bad job interviews, horrible church talks, and awful school presentations but I don't think it'll stop me from living a full and happy life. The next time you hear someone stutter and you think how hard it is to understand them, remember that you have to deal with it for a few minutes while they have to live with it constantly. They're much more aware and self-conscious of it than you are. At the end of the day, there are a lot worse disorders or disabilities that I could have so I'm not complaining...
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